woke up by sms from fer LOVE to get ready and start our shopping spree. oh man i wanted to do nail art but spend all on outfit and accesories in the end. how sad.

i wondered very long on what i wanna wear and finally decided on casual. shit, i hate to choose outfits. irritates me like how he, yea how he really really irritates me. what am i talking about?

met fer and er at control station and lai huan at bishan.

we walked around j8 for er's dress for her prom night and spot a really pretty one but she decided on another which i think wasnt really nice bought at fareast.

oh ya, i went town because serene(ahger) asked me out to bugis and for a minute i thought its my jie, who is also called serene(ahlim) and replied her sms calling her jie. oh man its really embarrasing. -.- this is the dumbest thing i've done so far. arghs. bought a YSL lookalike necklace at fareast and its so special. i really love it (: i'll try showing some photos if i can.

reached bugis after awhile to meet her and then carry on with shopping. we went up to a manicure shop named 'polished-diva' opened by my ex relieve teacher called elger kua. its right above chapter 2 and the atmosphere rocked. i remember him as a very nice guy, cute as well. was really happy i saw him cause i can have discount. =x i love all the designs but its really... expensive. oh man. i want the nail art done badly. cant wait. =/

fer and the others left after awhile and shopped on with ahger. bought a white fluffy-laced spag. also nice la but no more mood cause im broke. i remember having $1+ left. how pathetic. shit. i need her to treat me to BK as well. oh man.

reached home by cab, sponsered by ahger as well. -.-" quite a nice day, really. but my entry seemed boring cause im really lazy to type any further. this is such a draggy shit.

i'll be back for more.

ciaos. =/ dammit.

;i am afraid


OMG OMG OMG!! I CANT BELIEVE MY EARS AND EYES, FREAK FUCKING FUCKTARD!!

i wont tell you what happened. (: those who told me knows, i never tell anyone except my brother duh. COOL YALL~ lol, lmao, roflol... blah blah blah whatever you can think of goes along. YOU DIRTY DIRTBAG!! you wont even believe it if i told you what happened! (:

okay i write about darling's birthday outing.

17/11; the big day (:

shit i feel irritated writing this cause we quarrelled again. dammit.

27/11; we got together on 22/11/o5.

7 days after my last entry. i wouldnt change the date cause that is the day we broke up and everything changed so suddenly. maybe its because i met darling (xiao john) too fast and got together too fast. but i didnt regret cause i know what i want. how unfair is life? you always cant do it your way and get controlled by something or someone sometimes. it irritates me alot alot. i really hate life now. but i feel so much better after knowing he'll be by my side. forever? impossible? thats why life sucks.

my ezlink card and money got confiscated by momma cause i went out yesterday afternoon. i wanna see him so badly but i guess he aint free for me at all. i feel confused then, i thought he is what my friend told me, about him. it seem so true, am i too sensitive or isit what they expect to see? i tried so hard not to believe and i hope im right this time. just once and till the end. im afraid to lose him, so so so afraid but the nightmare seemed to be coming true already. isit my retribution for doing something bad to others? or is this what i deserve? i have no more words to further discribe my pain. let bygones be bygones. shit, what the hell am i talking about?

stayed at home for punishment. i wondered if he will ask me out with him if i could get out of the house. i wish he would. its so difficult to see what his thinking cause i heard and felt so many different thing about him. making me so confused, making me not knowing what to do anymore.

i want him too badly.

i'll update if i feel better.

;i am afraid


im drop dead tired.

oh lord, my head's falling off my shoulder as i haven't had good night sleeps for 4 days. how pathetic. im rushing on my birthday present for darling and i dont consider it completed yet. dammit alright.

went out with darling for his birthday and watched harry potter and the goblet of fire. not as good as what i expected. i'll write more tomorrow when i wake up.

darling is really happy today. (: happy birthday my lovely. hehe.

ciaos. *snores* *yawns*

dammit im tired alright.

;i am afraid


nothing to say about today. just plain old boring life, watched tv, ate leftover from yesterday's dinner and slack with my sims 2. they are growing well. thats what im happy about. (:

friday, 11.11 ;

wanted to go out in the afternoon but daddy wanna cook dinner so decided to watch 'all about love' with darling in the night. which is a 9.3opm show. nice nice nice and touching too. arghs think about it i have around 5 movies i wanna watch. harry potter and the goblet of fire, chicken little, in her shoes, just like heaven, exorcism of emily rose and maybe cello. hey thats like 6. shit, i think im gonna cost darling a bomb to watch these movies. @@
went kpool to slack although gary and cindy there. they never see me! oh my, how lucky. peng, his brother there as well and peng play with 'bruce lee'. lols, they know who. xD anyway, bought sandwiches and chocolate then went home.

its only 1 am plus and daddy was angry. i mean, its only 1 am! i wanna stay overnight at my friend's chalet, either for their birthday or for own pleasure. its something i've never tried so i wanna do it alot alot. hope can do so in up coming darling and qiming's birthday. it'll be really fun. i know it will cause i love chalets! cause it'll be by the seaside and then i could fall asleep there or something. NICE CAN?! i love the feeling alot alot alot but dont think anyone would understand cause going home late means im a bad girl or i'll encounter bad guys. oh man, i have people to ensure my safety, im sure. there's always darling. RIGHT? and home late means bad? even my previous classmates get to go chalets overnight. (you know 2e1, like the nerds or something. i dont know, but i sure know they can. SO WHY CANT I? @@)

i hate holidays. no job, no fun and no books yet! i can only get them at 15 or later. how rare i feel ready for the books next year. i really have alot confident. SERIOUS!

no point talking about all these, right? so ciaos now. maybe i'll come back to update for more. darling went out with friends after yahoo pool session with me. lols. miss him. (:

ya, ciaos.

;i am afraid


here in lan shop now at cwp doing nothing so thought of blogging. its really a do-it-out-of -boredom thing now. arghs i wonder why my life's so bored. boring life, boring games, boring hangout places, boring bf(what he said) just to add on. i think im gaining another 1okg @@ due to excess intake of food. like laksa. oh my, had this like once 2-3 days. =/ FAT ah.

played sims 2 for bout a week and had a baby called jay and pappy in the game got promoted so many times. he was really happy. momma in the game got a new bf. oh man, she wanna flirt. what can i do right? jay got a gf as well. first friend, first gf and first enemy, which is i forgot the name. he also wants a new baby brother or sister. cool game huh? haha! please give your view on whether to get university or night life(the expansion for sims 2)? both seemed fun to me. arghs. sorry im bored enough for this entry bout my game.

went to choir today and ended at 3 cause ms yee wanted to teach guys 'flying without wings'. we, the girls are doing 'reflection' instead. fun fun day and alister join our big family. his sick of red cross as well i guess. i am.

oh well, kinda miss school. im serious! hahas! im gonna start revising after i get my books. i heard N level really chicken feet!! lols. my aim for N level is 5 points. (: i dont know la. see lorh.

i'll be back for more later at home.
so long farewell, i need to say goodbye.
ciaos!

;i am afraid


heres another entry even though i didnt get to have my computer back in the room. my momma went overseas so i wanna blog like hell. its what i love doing anyway. my hand itched so much these no-blogging days. arghh!! you know how horrible this feeling is? dont know? then go get a blog and start writing. then slowly feelings grow with your damn blog alright. you would wanna see and write it when every other thing happen. oh man, i shouldnt talk bout this further. makes no sense. whatever.

took quite alot of pictures in this period and it may tell alot. if not then i'll write small captions or something. =pp im lazy larh. have mercy alright? (:

oh ya, celebrated my momma's birthday on the 3oth in crystal jade at cwp then 31th in partyworld at civic centre. kinda fun, bought cake for her as well. think she kinda happy, hor? bleaghh! =p




i'll start from this earliest date which is erm... i dont know. =D went out with fer LOVE and lynn PO to heeren for shopping and stuff. remember buying shoes costing $7.9o @@ btw, i look like a fat queen. omfg. =/



had neoprint shots with him, but its all passe. i hate it. quarrel with him again before going to heeren and bought lancome l'extreme mascara in blue(bleu in another language i guess) and did classic french manicure in fling at heeren. CHIO AH!! people, girls, ah gua, even guys!! go try leh. really nice ah!! at least i love it, and it only cost $2o.





outing with fer LOVE and lynn PO after my breakup with him. never take any with PO cause we were fooling around in the mrt. i was singing and laid down on the seats cause we went marina bay then back home. we can have the seats to ourselves!! hehe, at least till city hall. xD bought jumper kind of clothes @ $33 cause Glossy darling there and i have discount. LOL!! it cost $36+ actually. LOVE went manicure as well. (:
bought bright auburn hair dye and ate porridge at cwp.
its really brief but i'll be back for more. maybe.
oh my, look at the time!! im getting some beauty sleep.

ciaos. (:

i've deleted the part above before due to some personal issues. i dont know why i start to hate blogging cause im so restricted. fuck world and everyone. bye.

;i am afraid